🍄 2025: Joy January, Focus February
Let's get going
Oh hi! Remember me?!
I had a gloriously long break over the summer (aka Steph's Seven Week Summer Sabbatical). It feels like it was a lifetime ago, but it was the perfect basis of a much needed reset. I spent the first four weeks mostly at beaches (Byron, Pambula, Torquay, Anglesea) and in mountains (Kosciuszko), all with various friends for different parts of those trips.
My goals for the summer were to...
Nail surfing basics: I didn't surf quite as much as I thought I might, but made some really good progress in the surfs I did squeeze in, and I'm getting up on my feet pretty consistently now, so now need to learn some control!
Have a first draft of the book: I did quite a bit of writing, but I then spent quite a bit of time working on a pitch for publishers, after a very firm nudge from the very clever Odette Barry, during a very sweaty but very excellent lighthouse lap in Byron in December. This derailed about a couple of weeks of writing time, but feels like a worthwhile exchange.
Be sun-kissed and satisfied: ✅ (safely, of course) and ✅
Amongst the normal reflecting and planning, taking most of the summer off gave me plenty of space to think about what I want to focus more/less on in 2025, and just generally thinking about how I want to spend my time, and who with. Which is equal parts exciting and scary. I even created a Fronion to think about the ‘who’ part in more depth.
One of the other things I've been playing with creating this summer is creating a 2025 bingo card. I wanted a way to capture all the things that don't really need to be 'goals'. per se, but are worth keeping a bit of a track of, and having a way of prompting some more fun if I ever get into a fun-less rut. I've also been sharing the bingo card with some of my friends as a trigger for us to do some of those things together (to many enthusiastic responses).
On the subject of friendship, the book I’m writing on friendship has a name! Having felt a bit stuck with the holding name for a little while, an excellent meeting last week helped push me through the other side.
🥁 So, drum roll… 🥁
The book is now called How to Friend.
And on this note, I'm starting a separate newsletter to accompany the book. In that newsletter you'll find stories and examples of ways to spend more meaningful, connected, and fun times with your friends, essays and commentary on the state of modern friendship, and of course updates on the book. If that sounds like your cup of tea, sign up here 👇🏻👇🏻👇🏻
As we roll into the last week of summer, I’m enjoying the momentum-y feeling of February. The seeming endless energy everyone has now for catch ups, conversations, and adventures. Although there’s also a real theme this year of people wanting more space, joy, and fun in their lives. Hopefully that comes to fruition.
A couple of weeks ago I caught up with a friend for a Wednesday afternoon bodyboard rather than another lunch/coffee. It was *such* a good decision; floating in the ocean, having a loud conversations about life and work, and waiting for the perfect waves to race each other on. Highly recommend.
Hit reply or leave a comment to let me know how your year has started.
Steph
PS. To borrow from Austin Kleon, this newsletter is 'free but not cheap'. You can support their ongoing creation and keep me in books by buying me a coffee as a 'thank you', recommending it to a friend, or using any affiliate links in the email.
🔥 The it list 🔥
Current obsessions and things I’ve enjoyed over the summer.
Album - When it Falls by Zero 7: I was reminded of this album whilst hanging out with Megan (from Excited Adults) a few weeks ago. It's been on heavy rotation ever since.
Playlist - The good lounging ethiopian jazz monday afternoon mix: Not the snappiest of titles, but this was a save of an excellent daylist (hence the title) a few months ago. Again, this has had a lot of airtime on lazy afternoons spent reading on the sofa or sunlounger.
Playlist - The nice evening mix: Whilst enjoying a very relaxed evening in Byron Bay with a friend, Spotify served this beauty up. Which has since been saved and has made many appearances on lazy summer evenings.
Album - The Green Album by Weezer: this soundtracked a fun snorkelling day trip on the Victorian coast. I think this is the perfect summer album.
Playlist - Music for driving to Byron to: I love making a playlist for a specific event or road trip. So given my 9 day cat-sitting adventure in Byron was the start of my summer off, it seemed like the perfect excuse for a playlist that screamed of summer, was packed with nostalgia, and oozed sunshiney vibes... However, every time I got in the car to drive between the Gold Coast / Northern Rivers and Byron Bay, it poured down with rain. I would have been better off just sticking to my usual Radiohead-heavy playlists I already have plenty of.
Instagram - SMJ Falconry: this is my new favourite account to follow. Wholesome and informative videos of beautiful British birds of prey. Improve your feed.
Documentary - Blur: To the End: I’ve made quite the start with my bingo card item of watching 50 films this year (here’s what I’ve watched so far). The most disappointing to date has been the Blur documentary, which I’d been really looking forward to. It did confirm my assumptions that Damon Alburn is a mad genius and that Graham Coxon is an odd fish, but as a documentary I thought it was a bit incoherent and lacked depth.
App - Check In (iPhone): One of the recent iOS updates added the ‘Check In’ app. It allows you to select a person (or people) to be automatically notified when you get to a certain location, and to be notified if you don’t arrive at that location after a certain amount of time. I used it recently when going home late after a gig, so that the friend I’d gone to the gig with knew I’d got home safely. Obviously, I’d rather we didn’t need these apps, but given that’s not the reality we live in, I really like this new feature.
📚 What I’ve been reading
There is No Antimemetics Division by qntm
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
A dystopian, dark, fascinating, confusing, and excellent thought experiment about the existence of anti-memetics, or ideas with self-censoring properties that therefore prevents people from remembering, and spreading them.
Friendaholic by Elizabeth Day
⭐️⭐️⭐️💫
A memoir of friendship by author and podcaster Elizabeth Day, where she takes an equal parts funny and painful look into her own personality quirks that have lead to some wonderful and horrible friendships.
Just Friends by Gyan Yankovich
⭐️⭐️⭐️💫
Gyan takes a look at the role that friendships play, their changing nature throughout our lives, and layers this with scientific research and her own experiences.
Lola in the Mirror by Trent Dalton
⭐️⭐️⭐️💫
Sweet novel covering some difficult subject matter, another easy read full of big characters by Trent Dalton.
🔜 Book in progress: Clear Thinking by Shane Parrish
I really like Shane’s work, but I’m not loving this book so far. Full review to come once I’ve finished!
👋🏻 Some places I popped up recently
Podcast - This Working Life by ABC Radio National. I popped up on a recent episode talking about friendships at work. Listen on Spotify or Apple.
App - The People Spot: Each month I pop up in the audio tracks of the People Spot app sharing a few interesting signals about the future. These audio clips are included in the free download (iPhone only) and you can use the code STEPHC for an additional two months free access to the full content library in the app.
Learna - Learna is a new learning app for organisations to break the cycle of drudgery in their approach to learning. Organisations and teams I know who use it love it, and I’ve also got three modules on the platform. *Exciting news*: you can now download the app and sign up without needing your workplace to sign up for you! Apple | Android